clearly you have great mastery of "accurate descriptions." (Note to self: buy stamps from this man)
Kidding aside, the Swedish system (as created by the Swedish Philatelic Federation-- their equivalent of the APS) comes as close to being a "one word description" as any I have seen-- it makes more sense to me than the PSE defined "graded" stamps because it's actually descriptive
You have a three-number grade (for example 4,3,5) with the first digit describing "physical quality" (perfs, creases, thins, tears, etc.), the second digit describing centering, and the third digit describing the gum (for mint) or the cancel (for used). "5" is the top designation, "0" is the bottom.
In the example case, "4,3,5" tells me that the stamp may have as a "maximum defect" a discrete pencil note or expert mark on the back, and a faint corner perf bend (4xx); has F-VF centering; i.e. may be 50% off-center in one direction or 25% off center in two (x3x); and (since I collect used) has a S.O.N. upright readable cancel (xx5). Alternately, the "5" could mean post office fresh original gum, if the stamp is unused.
I doubt there's such a thing as a perfect system, but that one certainly goes part of the way.